Alberta Advantage

Alberta Advantage
Leftism on a cold, reactionary raft afloat on an ocean of oil.
Created 25 Jul 2019
52
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  • Now Eisenhower he's a Russian spy
    24 Sep 2021 • 4 min read
    This newsletter is presented unedited in solidarity with people who had surgeries cancelled so your weird neighbour can pretend he is a victim of Nazis trying to save his life with a vaccine. I was re...
  • Mother Hubbard soft soap me
    10 Sep 2021 • 3 min read
    This newsletter is late because the modelling was inaccurate and we moved from “semi-monthly” to “endemic” too fast. I know it’s trite and adorable from me but I think I have a better understanding of...
  • The newsman had a stutter
    26 Aug 2021 • 3 min read
    Bow chicka-bow-wow! Bow chicka bow-wow! Bow chicka-bow-wow! Bow chicka bow-wow! Bow chicka-bow-wow! Bow chicka bow-wow! Bow chicka-bow-wow! Bow chicka bow-wow! Bow chicka-bow-wow! Bow chicka bow-wow! ...
  • He was only talking to pieces of a man
    12 Aug 2021 • 4 min read
    This newsletter feels fine, why do you ask? Cooler heads, in terms of global average temperature, are dealing with crypto in the good, moral way that one deals with nerds - crushing them with great pr...
  • Door is closed, lights are out, butter's gettin' hard
    29 Jul 2021 • 4 min read
    This newsletter has COVID-like symptoms but is not required to isolate and will not be tested unless hospitalized. This is a good idea that will help our economy thrive. A hyper-local prediction - the...
  • And if the ground's not cold, everything is gonna burn
    08 Jul 2021 • 3 min read
    I’m worried about getting the Delta variant so I’m just licking things these days. Hand rails, cups on restaurant tables, door handles. Any high-touch surface. Get it over with, you know? I have my va...
  • The currency is murder, you a man of worth?
    25 Jun 2021 • 1 min read
    This is the newsletter that you have come to expect. It contains news and letters. I had a whole column written about Selma Hayek and Syriza but it seemed kind of stupid. Every time we open the earth ...
  • I don't wanna go fighting in the tropical heat
    10 Jun 2021 • 4 min read
    Imagine being a nurse in Alberta, sitting in the Telus Convention Centre, waiting to give vaccines for a deadly plague, and your chair is empty for hours because qualified boomers are just like “nah”....
  • I was born into this now I'm dying because of it.
    27 May 2021 • 4 min read
    Congratulations to everyone. We did it. We beat COVID. Everything is back to normal. Please don’t look behind this curtain. Yes I am aware you can see the hospital behind the curtain. Yes I am aware i...
  • Heed the threat and awesome power of the mighty Pentagon
    13 May 2021 • 5 min read
    You know who sucks? Customs goons at the CBSA. Tell me they make sense in 2021. They’re goddamn Stuff Cops. They just look at mail all day and determine how much it will cost to ransom your shit. If y...
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